Just My Thoughts…

I don’t like this world that we are living in. I don’t know if it’s just me or is there others out there? So much of brokenness around us and what are we doing? Those who complain about this sick world are probably the ones causing the problems or doing nothing about it. We live in a world that will grab a Ferrari at the expense of your bread and butter. Giving is better than taking but no one believes that anymore. We live in a society that aims high, so high that they will trample others to get there. Morals are out the window and what’s left in the room apart from chaos? We think we are good people because of what we have as if we worked for it but did we? We just acted shrewdly to obtain things without batting an eye. That’s the world we live in and sadly some people get into the rat race and they never get out of it. The rat race is when we strive to have a better lifestyle. So we get that car, we get that house, and all the luxuries that you can’t afford because it’s all on credit. Then you have a promotion and you earn more. So what do you do? Because you earn more you decide to upgrade your life. This results in you getting more in debt and you still have no money. So what has changed? Nothing! You still in the same situation, your life hasn’t improved! You still chasing money because of the debts and you still can’t sleep at night. We then compromise our morals because we are afraid of losing our jobs so we will do anything we are told to do. Hence, we are slaves…

Money has destroyed people by its existence and by its absence…

What about the Church? What are they doing? They are also in the system. Are they not? They preach promotion and money and blessings! You hardly hear about Christ and what He has done for you anymore. It’s all about what He can do for you if you pay more tithes. All those people who dress wealthily are handsomely welcomed but if a beggar came in, would they be treated Christlike? I don’t know. They probably would look down on them and think that God was punishing that person for their lack of faith. I remember being in a prosperity church when I was a kid. Everyone looked down on you as if you were a sinner. Strange enough, I probably knew the Bible more than them. I’m not boasting, they were. I remember when a man told my Dad during a meeting that the reason why he was battling financially was that he hardly spent time with God. Strange though, my Dad always had devotion every night. He attended church services religiously but that doesn’t matter, right? I would pray for God to bless me and provide all the things I needed but all I heard was my voice echoing off the ceiling and coming back to me with silence. Where you at God?

Some people treat God like He’s an ATM

‘Draw’ me close to you is what we say to Him

I stopped praying for blessings a long time ago. My good works don’t qualify for God’s grace. Yes, He provides but He gives because of His grace, not because He owes you. Not because you are a Christian. Not because you pay tithes. God is God and He is above all things. He cares for you. I learnt a lot during those times of struggle. It showed me my true friends and sadly, they are extremely few.

 

I wrote a book and wanted to publish it but I didn’t have the finances. I eventually got a job but now I don’t have time to edit it. I don’t have time to write anymore. I got a old laptop that takes long so I can’t do it when I come back from work. I write my poetry free style on the internet. I create these quotes for Instagram but that comes from my thoughts in my head. Sometimes I’m unable to write that thought down and so I forget it, never to return again. I said things to people that made them cry yet on the other side of the world someone is hating me for telling the truth. I encourage one person and then switch to someone who is debating against the Gospel. Atheists, Calvinists and people who believe that I’m too religious. Currently, 32% of my followers say that I’m too judgmental. I guess that’s what they call those who tell the truth. I write poetry for the Church and I know they not going to like it. But the day is coming when I will say what I need to say, and they will have to hear the truth.

pexels-photo-459688.jpeg

 

Enough of the past and the present. Let’s go to the future. I’ve been thinking about a lot of the One who I will be spending my life with. I haven’t met her yet and I’m starting to question her existence. It’s hard searching for something rare but it’s even harder waiting for something that you expect to be coming. Especially when the clock is ticking. Many of my friends are already married or are thinking about it. I have never dated before because I’m waiting patiently for the One. People ridicule me, I don’t care but what if she isn’t real? I want a godly woman but it’s hard to see some in my church! I guess my standards are too high or they just succumbed to the status quo of church women? Maybe I’m too religious or self-righteous but I’m not willing to compromise who I am for the sake of infatuation. I’m not saying that these women are low standard but I’m not going to be in a relationship where there is no compatibility.

“Don’t worry Kristian, you will find a nice godly woman who you will marry.”

“Thanks, but I stopped believing in fairytales a long time ago…”

I’m someone with logic. I won’t give it up for emotions. Too many people let down their morals for beauty. But I rather find beauty in someone who leads me to Christ. You would be surprised to find how many people who regret marrying who they are married to right now. They hate men/women and trash talk marriage. I don’t want to end up like that. To marry someone is to dedicate your entire life to that person so you have to make the right decision! If you are interested in someone, don’t go hitting them up over text, they can hide who they are with those emoji’s. Spend time face to face and then you will know who you are dealing with. Because if you are having a relationship over a mobile device, chances are you will one day marry that stranger!

I have to admit that I have like girls in the past. Girls that I had admired or maybe I was just infatuated with but I never pursue them because I knew I wasn’t ready. The question is: How will I know when I am?

I feel in love with someone. Or probably the illusion that I have created in my mind of who she is or will be like. Chances are, my dreams will come true or I’ll be greatly disappointed…

The Curse Of Comparison

According to psychology, one of the most evident causes for unhappiness is comparing yourself to others. This is profoundly true. It is amazing how comparing yourself to others can rid you the joy of what you have.

It is a proven fact that Facebook causes depression in their users because everyone seems to be happier than you.

If you don’t believe me, compare your significant other to someone else and see what happens. People don’t like being compared to others, why should we do that to ourselves?

When I was in high school, I wasn’t the most intelligent but people assumed that I was and many approached me for help with certain subjects. Some students used to say that before every exam I would eat the textbook and vomit it out on the test papers. The strangest thing is that there were more intelligent students than me. There was one guy who used to throw a fuss because he had 99% for a maths paper and he would demand from the teacher for that 1%. And here I am, thanking God that I got my 80%.

Happiness is relative.

Yet I always asked God: How come those students who don’t even know you, achieve such good grade and I don’t?

I went through school and eventually, the last day arrived and as I waited for my Dad to pick me up I overheard those students speaking about the drugs that they had taken during a party and that they were plotting for another go at it. I then realized something: They may be intelligent but that doesn’t mean that they have wisdom…

Wisdom can only come from God. Intelligence is from this world and it means nothing without God.

So remember, next time you compare yourself to others, what are you missing in your own life that you haven’t seen yet? What troubles are you begging from God that is in the that person’s life that you wish you could have? What standard are you using to justify that your life is dull and mundane? Is it the worldly standard or the will of God?

The world will tell you that you will be happy when you have that great job, marriage, house and car but look around, we see divorces, stressed jobs that leave no time for family, a car that drives you to places you don’t want to go and a empty house.

The comparison complex affects everyone but we need to snap out of it. The famous one is the single comparison. I used to be affected with this. There comes a time when you realize that you are single and it is like an epiphany. Strange enough, everywhere you go you see happy couples. They are mesmerized by each other and you wish you had someone by your side. What makes it worse is that I do online surveys and every one of them asks me my relationship status. Single.

The world has made it seem that singleness is a disease or some kind of hardship. but it is just a temporary time in your life. Enjoy your singleness, because once you lose it, to gain it back with either be the tragedy of divorce or widowhood.

Soul Ties

Dating ruins people’s lives. Literally. You might ask how? It’s quite simple yet complex.

Soul Ties.

A soul tie is a connection in the spiritual realm between you and someone else. You have a soul tie with your Christian friend. That is a healthy soul tie. If you have ungodly friends, frequent association with them can cause an unhealthy soul tie. You have a soul tie with your parents, your siblings and whoever you have a relationship with but when it comes to intimate relations, that’s where the trouble begins….

Many claim that soul ties can only form if the relationship was sexual. Not exactly. Sex will increase the strength of the soul tie but that doesn’t mean that it’s not there if it wasn’t done. It’s actually all to do with the mind and the soul.

In 1 Samuel 18:1, we find that David and Jonathan had a soul tie even though they were just friends.

adult-alone-boy-236147

As mentioned before, it is a proven fact that if you break up with someone, the more you want to be with them. Why? Because there is a soul tie. It’s like two pieces of paper stuck together with the glue of time and expectation. If you pull the pages apart, it will start to rip. a piece of the first page will be stuck on the second and vice versa. I guess it’s why we say “they got attached’ to each other.

Now unhealthy soul ties can affect your walk with God especially if the person you dated wasn’t really a good Christian. This means that the soul tie must be broken! That means that if you have anything that they gave you and it reminds you of them, throw it away! Don’t keep it. Also, you need to pray for God to break every soul tie so that you can be free.

You might also want to renounce every promise you made to that person like: “I will love you forever”; That is a vow that you have to renounce.

Pray before you go into a relationship. This can save you from a lot of heartache and pain.


How does dating harm you?

It’s like this…

You date someone. You get attached to them. You actually love them. You even kissed. Held hands. Maybe something you not supposed to do. Whatever….

Then you broke up for whatever reason.

You go through a state of depression because you miss them. Your soul actually longs for them. You wish you could see them again. You hope to see them at the mall or on the way to work.

Then you get over them.

You meet someone new.

And you will compare that person with your ex. The way this person kisses or holds your hand or whatever. You will always be comparing and never happy because a part of that person is in you.

The cycle continues.

And when marriage begins, you might be unhappy with the so many souls that are attached to you.

 

Pray that every soul tie that is not of God to be broken. Pray before going into a relationship. ( Next post will be about exes.)

Courting Vs Dating

I am not entirely qualified for this topic but I’m going to write about it anyway. I just feel that people are constantly making wrong decisions because it’s based on feelings instead of waiting on God.

It is clear that dating and courting are very different. They actually contradict each other. However, courting and godly dating could be synonymous  but I prefer to be old fashioned by calling it ‘courting’.

Whereas courting was always the norm, the term ‘dating’ derived from the year 1896.  Courting involved one partner and then marriage. Dating, however, involves hanging out with someone and then dumping them because they don’t seem to be the one and history is repeated.

It is a proven fact, that when you break up with someone, the more you want to see them and be with them. Ultimately, it was never intended for us to make relationships and break them…

There are many dates in a month but only one court in a district.

After the norm of dating had begun, divorce rates soared up 20 times over. That’s 2000%! Every Christian person that I met who is currently ‘dating’ someone have failed to answer this one question that I ask: Have you prayed before you started dating?

Untitled design

Courting is for people who are ready to be in a relationship and are looking for someone to spend the rest of their lives with. That someone, of course, must be a godly someone.

Dating is for those who want to have fun, waste people’s time and end up damaging themselves and hurting others. (In my next post ‘Soul Ties‘, I will explain how).

So what’s so special about courting? Courting involves your parents…

Yes! Who can give you better godly advice than your parents? Why not invite her for lunch at your home so that your parents can meet her? Why not go for supper at his house to meet his parents? Many times, a couple will reveal their spouse when they have already proposed marriage and the parents literally hate them. And by then, it would be too late. You end up spending the rest of your life with a monster-in-law.

What’s wrong with going on the first date with an adult? If you want to go alone, what are your intentions?

A lot of people are going into relationships without even praying about it. And when it doesn’t work out, they blame God! Unreal!

When I was in school I made sure I never get entangled in a relationship at such a young age. Even when a girl asked me to the matric dance (prom) I still said no. That’s a bit religious I guess. What’s even worse was that I didn’t have transport to the venue and so that same girl gave me a lift to the dance. With. Her. Partner!


I can’t believe I’m doing this but here are some tips on relationships:

For guys

  • You are to pursue but don’t stalk. Make sure you first pray. The lion doesn’t always catch the prey.
  • Don’t flirt with girls if you don’t intend to pursue a relationship that will lead to marriage.
  • Abstain from all sexual influences such as pornography and promiscuous friends who talk about vulgar things
  • Don’t let the world shape your view of a relationship
  • Stay away from Jezebels
  • Read the Bible version of relationships
  • If she is not interested, leave her alone.
  • Sex before marriage is a sin

For girls

  • Pray before getting into a relationship
  • You must wait. Don’t ever pursue.
  • Don’t go around flirting
  • Don’t get into a relationship because you are lonely. That only means that your entire happiness is based on another individual and not in God alone.
  • Don’t get into a relationship with a guy if you have no intentions to marry
  • Don’t compare yourself to others. Just because they are in a relationship doesn’t mean that they are happy. It doesn’t mean that it’s going to last either.
  • Don’t let your search for a partner be inspired by chick flicks
  • Stay away from players
  • If he is not prepared to wait during the prayer interval. He will not be patient in other things.
  • If you think a guy is going to complete you, you haven’t met Jesus yet.

To make up or not to make up?

Should Christian women wear makeup or not? I might end up single for the rest of my life saying this but I have to tell the truth. According to the Bible, the only person who wore makeup was Jezebel (2 Kings 9:30). To say that Jezebel was a bad person would be an understatement. She was a feminist witch.

Also in 1 Timothy 2:9

Likewise, I want the women to adornthemselves with respectable apparel, withmodesty, and with self-control, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes,

As you can see, theologically, women shouldn’t really wear makeup.

But let’s use logic….

While you are single…

A guy will look at you and the makeup will stimulate an attraction because of the bright colours. Ladies, do you really want a guy who loves the way you look by anatomy? Or do you want him to love you by who you are?

While you are married…

There’s no reason to wear makeup when you are married because your husband loves you for who you are….unless you are trying to attract attention from other men?????

In conclusion, makeup does harm to your face. And you have to keep using it to ‘look good’. So be happy with the way God made you….



My Plan

So hypothetically speaking, if I like a girl. I will pray about it. If God gives me the ‘go ahead’, I will not even go to her. I will go to her father or mother. I will tell them that I am interested in their daughter. I will then ask if I could have lunch with them. Then on the day, while eating with them, I will be interrogated by the parents and they will eventually know everything about me. (Including the daughter).

And then I will leave. I will not say a word to her. Her parents will…..